Four-fingered carnies, clowns, and creaky rides are such cheap shots by now they've lost their character. Besides, who's honestly surprised to find that carnies could potentially be seriously injured on the job?
What we're looking for here are those things that are so ingrained in the Dade County Youth Fair that the only thing that would really creep us out would be to go and not find them one year. So, enough with the strange goo on your cotton candy or bizarre animals you saw in the exotic creatures tent. So in honor of the last weekend of the Fair, here are what we found to be the top five creepiest things you're going to find there.
1. The carnie trying to stare up your skirt while you're on the ride.
Women might have a tough time spotting this guy. Hey, you're numb by the fact that five guys are already staring at you for every one step you take. Plus, while this guys is ogling your gams, you're hanging six plus feet off the ground while your upper body is encased in a harness that barely lets you turn your head. Your boyfriend or husband, on the other hand, is not used to all the stares you get, and has been on to the guy since halfway through the line. Then, as the ride tilts to an angle at which he can catch the guy in the act, he must try and bottle his anger so as not to make you feel uncomfortable; compile that with the 20 bucks that will likely fly out his pocket while upside-down and end up tight in that same carnie's fist, and you can understand why he's so frustrated when you get mad at him for not noticing your haircut.2. The 13-year-old girl trying to look 25 by wearing more make-up and less clothing.
This one's pretty self-explanatory, but it's worth pointing out that almost without fail, the younger she is and the older she tries to look, the thicker his beard is and the baggier his jeans get.
3. The guy at the "shoot the man with a paintball gun" booth getting WAY too excited about the game.
Next time you're around there, just camp out for a minute and watch some of these guys have a go at it. Sometimes, the smile gets so big they don't even look like they're having fun anymore. The best part is when they are out of ammo, snap back into reality, and realize there are still people around.
4. The grown man bullying little kids in the bumper cars.
You've all seen him or had to deal with him as a kid. Sometimes, he gets so into it, the kid will loose a whole ride stuck in a corner, and even get off crying and running to his or her mother. Hell, who are we kidding? That's just fun.5. Yours truly.
Let's face it: it doesn't get much creepier than some scummy paparazzi running around the Youth Fair, taking notes on people while they're trying to enjoy themselves. If there were a prize to be won here, we'd be taking home the gold. So let














